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Tuesday, December 24, 2013

The Christmas Quiz

Read anothercleanslate's blog this morning and thought I'd take a crack at these questions.

1. What do you love the most about Christmas time?

I'll be completely honest here. It used to be all about the gifts with me. When I was in my teens, spending time with extended family seemed like a chore. All I cared about was what I'd gotten, and taking it all for granted. However though, within the last couple of years something clicked, and the presents weren't even important. (Although I really get excited to see people's faces with what I bought them). And although the food is delicious, I enjoy my time with extended family much more.

2. Do you celebrate the holiday in style or is Bah-Humbug for you?

I wouldn't really describe it as "bah-humbug". I just don't find it important to decorate my place, especially if no one is going to see it. I'd rather spend money on gifts, or things that I actually need, than to buy trinkets and weird things to decorate my place with (and then find a place to store it!). I'm just practical. I enjoy holiday lights, I don't mind other people who are in the spirit more than I am, it's just not my thing.

3. Are you leaving anything out for Santa Claus this year so he remembers to leave your presents?

I stopped doing that when I was 10 :P I honestly don't think I was ever told per se, that Santa didn't really exist. I just knew what my parent's handwriting looked like and they didn't even bother to change it up when writing on Santa's gifts to me. They actually tried to perpetuate the myth longer than I believed in it, which was... interesting. lol

4. What is the one gift you are most looking forward to GIVING? {It can be to your kids, another family member, etc – remember to be discreet if they read your blog}

Well, it was going to be the Keurig machine for my mom, but DAD had to ruin that. (Note my bitterness). But no, I got mom something else that I think she will hopefully like just as much!

5. What is your all-time favorite Christmas movie?

Santa Claus: The Movie. Note that I did NOT say "The Santa Clause [Movie]" (which I also really love and need to watch again!) which everyone thinks of when I say that. No, this is a rare gem I found a few years back that didn't do well review-wise (everyone says John Lithgow was the only thing holding that movie together. But I really liked Dudley Moore), but I really enjoy the story of not only the origin of Santa, but his need to change as society leaps into the 21st century. 

6. What is your all-time favorite Christmas song?


7. If given the opportunity, would you participate in an “Ugly Sweater” party and what sweater would you wear? Peruse one on the Internet or even if your own closet and show us!

Erm... No.

8. Have you started any Christmas traditions this year that you plan on carrying forward?

Well, none this year. Maybe next year. But what, I wonder? o_O

9. It’s Christmas morning… what does it look like outside where you live?

Pfffft. The same as it does in, lets see, October and November. Thank you, Washington weather.

We should have just decorated that tree instead.

10. You just found yourself standing under the mistletoe… who comes up to give you a kiss first?

Alton Brown!! Lol kidding. I think if he was at any party of mine I'd probably faint long before I got to the mistletoe. Mom would want Russell Wilson (of Seahawks fame). If I could give her that for Christmas I think I'd be set for life. 

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Recipe Change Ups

If any of you have been following along in my blog, I just got done with another round of the hCG diet. All in all, I lost 23 pounds in 42 days. There were a couple of hiccups along the way with no weight loss for some unknown reason, but I pushed through it. Now I'm on the "Atkins" 3-week stabilization period, where I've failed at least twice before and regained a bunch of weight back. Once you get out of shape during these 3 weeks it's really hard to get back on track and it's easy to give up. I was determined not to let that happen to me again! So, I've looked up a number of recipes online that are low carb. The only difference between Atkins Induction and this stabilization period (besides the fact that if you gain 2+ lbs you can't have anything to eat all day until dinner and then stuff yourself full of the fattiest steak you can find. I've done this before and it works, but I hate starving myself all day) is that not only does it need to be low carb, but also low fat (and as little sugar as possible), so not every Atkins Induction recipe will work for my needs.

So, I've scoured the internet looking for some good ones, and as always, I want to thank Alton Brown for giving me not just the knowledge of how to put together a recipe, but how to COOK in general. How to know what will work and what won't, and how to make changes to get your food to taste even better.

Case in point, a Cheesy Chicken Broccoli recipe I found on genaw.com. I'm sure it's good as is, but I knew I could make it REALLY good.

It calls to cook the chicken and bacon ahead of time, add some mayonnaise, sour cream and chicken bullion and mix it all together with the broccoli, sprinkle cheese on top and bake for 25 minutes in a 350 degree oven. Well, that's all well and good, but honestly, I hate the texture of melted cheddar cheese. It gets hard, plastic-y, and so greasy, so I had a better idea. Here is my recipe (which isn't quite as Atkins friendly unfortunately!):

Cook your chicken and bacon ahead of time and make a basic bechamel sauce instead. I used Alton Brown's recipe that he taught me for his baked Mac and Cheese. However, I ended up with WAY too much sauce, so you can cut it in half, or save it for another application! I did only 10 oz of cheese since he calls for 3/4 of it to be in the sauce and the rest to go on top. But I changed it up again - I had several different kinds of cheese, so I used  2 slices of pepper jack, 2 slices of provolone, 2 slices of Colby jack, and the remainder as shredded cheddar. It had a slightly queso-dip taste due to the pepper jack which I really liked.

[The basic bechamel requires 3 tbs of flour. Since I only used about half the sauce, that's only 1-1/2 tbs of flour, and that 1-1/2 tbs is divided into at least 4 servings, so I really don't think the carb count would be terrible. I did omit the garlic powder as she suggested to save on carbs as well.]

The only other change I made to the recipe was that instead of doing 1/4 cup mayonnaise and 1/4 cup sour cream, I saved some fat by doing 1/4 Greek yogurt in place of the sour cream. I also did what she suggested and just added the bullion cube to that mixture without any added water.

One word of warning: I wouldn't be too liberal with the salt, here. Cheese has a lot of salt, so does bacon and the bullion cube. My final product was a bit salty because I'd seasoned the chicken prior to cooking, and salted the cheese a bit. 

But the end result? Oh my goodness, it's amazing. I'm going to be making this over and over for sure!



I've done minor changes to a couple of other recipes as well, mostly by replacing some of the fat with Greek yogurt, which I can't even taste in the final product. I did it with an egg salad recipe I found on the same website, and it tastes just as good to me!

Saturday, November 16, 2013

A Warning about Roommates

A lot of people think the possibility of having a roommate is great. All the bills are cut in half, and if your apartment is big enough, you might not even know they're there. Many people have suggested to me that when I move out again, I need a roommate because I don't make enough to afford anything worthwhile in this city. But I refuse to even consider the notion, and I'll tell you why.

Justin and I were living in a crapshack apartment when he met his new best bud, Karl. Karl, who was a highly-functional alcoholic, and basically set in motion the downward spiral of our whole marriage, but I digress. Well, I wanted out of this crapshack badly, and Karl was already bunking with us on the couch due to fights he kept having with the 6 roommates in the house he currently shared. So, we devised a plan to find a better place to live, with 2 bedrooms. He signed the lease with us, and we were living in what I considered "luxury" (far from it really, but oh so much nicer than what we could afford on our own).

Everything went fine the first 6 months. We were trying to help him out in a way by getting his life in order. Getting a bank account, and applying for a credit card in order to gain credit history. But things were slowly degrading, and although I was reluctant, we signed the lease again for a second year. However, only 2 months in, I told Karl that I wanted him out. Our marriage was collapsing in on us for several reasons. First of all, Justin's priority was Karl and booze, and as much as I told him to get back on track, it didn't matter. I needed Karl out in order for this marriage to function.

Karl was not the perfect roommate either. After all, he was an alcoholic, so there were times that he got so drunk he would vomit in his own bed. Twice, he tried to make it to the bathroom and failed, vomiting all over the carpet. But, that wasn't the worst part. Oh no. He decided to vacuum it up; with our bagged vacuum cleaner that was from the 80's. Every time we'd used it since, it smelled like vomit. He would always leave his clothes in the washer/dryer and forget about them and stopped me from doing my laundry unless I fixed it. He would always bring up "but you leave them in there too, and when you did, I hung them up for you!". That was once, 7 months ago. Get over it.

Anyway, I'd had it. I wanted him out and I told him so. I said he had 10 months to get some money saved up and look for a place. That was plenty of time. It would be hard on Justin and I, but we could scrounge and afford to live here ourselves. I would bug him about it a lot, I even looked online and helped search for possible places to live. I even told him I would help by paying some of the costs towards moving out. He wasn't even my friend, but that's how badly I wanted him gone.

Well, when the time came for Justin and I to resign the lease, Karl had refused to move out. He stated that he wasn't warned. Wasn't given enough time. Didn't have any money saved up, and hadn't looked for a place. Well fine, I thought. It didn't matter. It was two against one and we wouldn't let him resign the lease. Turns out, I was wrong. Very wrong. There is no recourse to get a roommate out of your apartment unless he did something illegal. He had the right, the right, to resign that lease. Justin and I were stuck. Unless we moved, all three of us would have to resign the lease, and I absolutely refused to let that happen. We weren't prepared to move ourselves but we had established credit. I would do it if I had to. Karl told us that he would live in this apartment all by himself. I laughed. I scoffed. Justin and I could barely afford this place. He would be sunk within 2 months. But you know what, let him drown like a rat. I would have loved to watch that happen. He was essentially stealing the apartment out from under our feet, and there was not a damn thing that we could do about it.

Well, so while we were considering our options, Karl went into the office in order to do the screening, since he'd be living there on his own. He barely scraped by with enough income to rent it by himself, but that didn't include utilities. Well, when they ran his background check, they found his criminal record. (oh, didn't I tell you about that? Karl had a felony for trafficking/selling drugs a couple years back. It had been reduced to a misdemeanor but it still reflected as a felony on his background check. When we'd first applied for the place 2 years ago, the temp manager had missed it, apparently.)

Karl tried everything he could. Got court records, blah blah blah. But he'd actually lied on the screening and said he'd had no felonies. So even if he could prove that it was a misdemeanor, they would not guarantee an apartment because he'd lied. Oh my God, sweet sweet redemption. It was the best day of my life. Not only could he not resign the lease with us, but he was forced to move out within 30 days. And guess what? Somehow he'd found the money to find a place to live.

So, roommates? No thank you. I think I'll pass.

Monday, October 28, 2013

How desperate are you to lose weight?

Really think about that answer for a while. How long have you been suffering? Do you have bullies (yes, even adults can have bullies) that constantly berate you about your weight? Have you tried everything? Are you willing to try anything?

Answer these questions for me (especially the ladies):

1.       Are you willing to give up wearing make up?
2.       Are you willing to give up all lotions and moisturizers?
3.       Are you willing to weigh and cook your own food instead of ordering pre-packaged crap from the diet stores?
4.       Are you willing to take something that’s not FDA approved? (I never thought the FDA cared at heart, but I digress.)

      How about doing that for just 26-42 days? Sound better?

I’m talking about hCG. You’ve probably heard it both praised and blasted in recent years. It was even featured on the Dr. Oz show, supposedly. I have a feeling that, just like every other doctor out there, he criticized the diet. And it is quite a diet – a mere 500 calories a day. And all the doctors say “Well of course you would lose weight on only 500 calories a day, but it is unhealthy for your body and even dangerous!”. But what they always too conveniently forget is that you’re not hungry. If you were to do this diet alone without the hormone, you would be starving, wouldn’t you? You would probably cheat like crazy within a day or two. But it’s been scientifically proven that it’s not your stomach that tells you when you’re hungry, but your brain when it craves nutrients. The reason hCG works is because it is breaking down the fat in your body and essentially “eating it”. Unlike if you were to do the diet alone, muscle would be the first casualty before any fat gets eaten, there is proof in hCG with ketone strips. As people that have done the Atkins diet are aware: ketones are released with the destruction of fat cells, and gets passed to your urine, which can then be detected on the strips. 

The next argument they give is “well, it’s all just psychological”. Really? Are you telling me that just by brain power alone, after 42 days of just eating 500 calories a day, I could still climb stairs, walk and talk normally without a fuzzy feeling, feel awake and completely normal? Damn. That’s amazing. Actually, the first week of the first time I tried this diet back in 2009, I was starving. Part of it was psychological in the fact that I was used to eating not just when hungry, but when bored. I would confuse my body’s want of hydration for being hungry, and eat even when I wasn’t. So, when I started this diet, I had to just take it and realize that I couldn’t munch on the couch anymore. It was an extremely hard habit to break. But when that first week was done, I was okay. The hunger pretty much went away. I do still get hungry at times, even now as I’m doing my 8th round (I had a couple of failed attempts; more on that later), but I drink tea and water, and it usually disappears within 10 minutes.

It takes extreme dedication and willpower to go on this diet. All the ads tout that “you can lose 42 pounds in 42 days!” which, by the way, isn’t even true. It’s 32 lbs at most. For women you can lose about .5 lbs a day if you’re lucky. Sometimes men can lose a bit more. But it’s really not “too good to be true” because honestly, this diet sucks. It sucks bad. It is not easy. Putting what you can only eat aside, the simple fact that cheating is all but impossible. If you were to cheat – even just a little bit, by say, having a salted almond (yes, just one almond) or forgetting and using lotion one day, you will see the consequences of your actions the next morning on the scale. Not only will you not have lost any weight, but you might have even gained some. And considering that you’re on a time limit; either 26 or 42 days depending on how much weight you want to lose, every day counts. The diet severely limits what you can eat, and no substitutions are permitted.

But, on the plus side, I have lost over 100 lbs on this diet. You get validation each and every day when you weigh yourself and see the weight slipping off. You’re not hungry, you still feel completely normal, and even better: you’re actually not allowed to exercise. Like, at all. Exercising has always been my downfall. Well, besides my extreme lack of willpower with cupcakes that are in the break room.

 
This is me in October of 2009,                                       This is me July 2012, 175 lbs
all 290 lbs of me.

But, back to the bad news. As I stated before, the FDA has not approved hCG for weight loss in this country. In fact, they even out right banned the sale of homeopathic hCG in the stores. But that’s okay with me – one of my failed rounds of this diet was with the homeopathic version. I’ve read how people praise it and how it works for them, but it didn’t work for me. I was hungry and I cheated. I didn’t last very long taking the drops. Besides, I’ve read that you will not see ketones in your urine when on it, like with the real stuff. So tell me again how or why it works? 

Anyway, so after I decided to try this diet the first time, I looked up a lady on youtube named Mamaclok. She was my savior. She told me how to order and mix my real hCG so that I could take it sublingually – or under the tongue in other words. (That’s right, no shots!)

If you’re still interested, please watch her videos. She will even show you how much weight she’s lost. But they are kind of old, and where to order it is out of date. The place I have always ordered from is escrowrefills.com, but they have become referral based for some reason. However, if you’d like to order, I have an invitation code and I can post it in the comments; just let me know. It’s not that cheap, and I repeat: it’s not easy. Please read Dr. Simeons .pdf “Pounds and Inches”. He was the original creator of the diet back in the 1950’s and it’s written as a clinical trial so there’s a bunch of mumbo-jumbo, but it includes how the diet works, why cheating is bad, and what exactly the diet is.

So I ask again: How desperate are you?


Sunday, October 13, 2013

The day I put a hole in my car

Back in the way back, in the before time around '06-'07, I was heading up to Seattle for a job interview. Back then, I was scared of driving on freeways, especially going north, and I absolutely hated driving in Seattle (still do, really). What possessed me to apply for this job in the first place? I couldn't even tell you. I must have been desperate, because the one thing I despise is heavy commute traffic and from Tacoma to Seattle is some of the worst.

I should have taken this as a sign to turn my ass around and head home. But noooo… out of some kind of obligation, or pride, or desperation (possibly all three), I continued my drive up to the despicable city and horrid company tower.

What happened, you ask?

I ran over a piece of metal on the road and it ended up hitting my thigh.

It was an interesting set of circumstances. I was driving my Mercury Mystique, which if you've followed my earlier posts know of its lousy track record, and there was some debris on the road from a possible previous accident. It had been swept over to the pullout by the fast lane, but I managed to hit a piece of metal anyway. All I remember is the sudden pain in my upper thigh. I was like “WTF?” I couldn't really see anything down there, especially since I was driving – on a busy freeway I might add. I kept rubbing my thigh, wondering what in God’s name happened. Then, I noticed a flash of light occasionally coming from the floor of my car. That flash of light happened to be the shine of the pavement that I could see through a 2 inch hole in my floorboard. And in that gap was a piece of metal that looked to be the kind of square iron rod that is found in the bays of pick-up trucks. It didn't take much deduction to realize that I’d ran over this piece of metal parallel to the car, and the velocity of the tire threw the metal right through the floor and into my thigh.

That's right - I still have it after all this time. Ahh, the memories.

It was painful, but as far as I could tell I wasn't bleeding profusely or anything. I even managed to save the piece of metal by pulling it all the way out of the hole - while I was still driving, mind you. The damn thing was probably 2 feet long. So, my choice was to take this as a sign and book it out of this stupid city, or continue to this interview that I probably wasn't going to get the job for anyway.

Obviously, I chose the latter. So, I parked and checked out the damage, which was actually very minimal. Nothing but a small hole. Pretty amazing. However, my wound would have to wait. It was really high up on my thigh and I wouldn't be able to take a look without a mirror. I entered the building and looked for a restroom, since I was early (of course). The bathrooms were locked and for employees only. I hate Seattle. So, I just went into my interview. I have a feeling that I didn't get the job because I told her what had happened on the way here and how scared I was to drive in this damn city! (Not one of my proudest moments). After I left, I attempted to find a fast food restaurant so that I could finally see WTF was wrong with my leg. I pulled into a McDonald's, and saw a sign that said “restrooms are for paying customers only”. Did I say I hated this city? So, pissed off, I decided just to drive home instead. Luckily, the wound was nothing more than a bloodless cut/gash-thing and bruise. I also never got the hole in the car fixed, so it was kind of cool to see the road beneath me. Totally made it worth having that junk of a car (not!).

I’m so glad I didn't get that job.

Monday, October 7, 2013

I'm not dead, I promise.

I know I haven't been posting much lately and I do apologize. I mean, I know ya'll were worried about me, right? Right? I thought so.

Anyway, I've been pretty busy and stressed lately, which is pretty unusual for me. (The being busy, not the stressing.)

I've decided to "go back to school" for one thing. I put that in quotes because I'm not really going anywhere; it's all online. I specifically chose this because I work 8 hours a day and I don't know how other people do it, but I just can't possibly fit 40 hours a week at work and 30 hours a week at school and still have any semblance of a life. When you add possible additional commutes to the mix, I don't even think it's scientifically possible. Anyway, so I decided to become a coder. (I know, I'm cute. Like I can go to school at this day and age and say I'll become anything). They fit my personality to a T, except for all the numbers bit. I'm horrible with numbers. (But at least it's not math!). But, I get to sit in a cubicle all by myself and work alone and do my thing with no patient interaction and then go home. Perfect.

Thanks to how Franciscan and how the classes work, I get to pay 100% out of pocket, too. And I don't mean a student loan. Nope, don't even get that. For one thing, Franciscan will only pay for your schooling if you 1. Do classes that Franciscan can use you for. AKA, nurse, doctor, physical therapist. (Apparently, CODERS don't count.) and 2. You get a college degree. Coders don't get college degrees. They get a certification. So immediately, I'm out for any kind of tuition reimbursement from Franciscan. Secondly, banks (or the Government) won't give me a student loan because AHIMA is not a college, per se. They are the accreditors of the HIM (health info management) field, and they just happen to offer online courses through their website. Through my research, they were really the only ones that offered a completely self-paced course that you could buy one class at a time and complete at your leisure. In other words, for people like me.

I've also been busy busting my hump at work these last couple of weeks thanks to the implementation of the EPIC electronic medical record (EMR). I'm sure many of you heard me bitching about it on my facebook page. 

This was me last week.

In addition to going to school and learning a whole new system and workflow, I've been desperately grasping at straws trying to keep my current job. I work in Medical Records. We're implementing EMR. Which means I'm basically no longer needed. Franciscan is trying to phase out all of the clinic med recs people, and consolidate them into one cohesive unit, in one room. I want to stay with Saffari, and both him and our ARNP are trying to fight to keep me, because they know I'm needed and they know I want to stay. But it's not guaranteed. So, in the meantime, I have to reach out to make sure that I still have stable employment. They're offering jobs in 2 phases. Phase one ( a couple of weeks ago) was for 14 ROI positions (release of information) which I applied for and failed to get. Phase 2 will be for (I think) 22 HIM positions in central medical records, which should be coming out any day now. Be aware that there are more than 60 HIM people out in the field who will be clamoring for all 36 positions. This is what I'm up against. It won't be easy, despite my experience. A new, recent development gives me renewed hope that I might be able to stay in Saffari's office, though. If Stephanie, one of our current PARs (patient access rep. I know, a lot of freaking acronyms, huh??) becomes a full-time referral coordinator for our office (which we desperately need) that will leave an opening for a PAR that I can fill. But, we shall see. I can't put out too much hope though, lest I be greatly disappointed.

Anyway, that's what's been going on with me these last few weeks. What have you been doing?!

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Music That Defines Me

Or music that tells you how I use the Domino effect to remember things!

Well, I can start out by saying that this song tells you about my tenacity.


I watched this music video back in elementary school, during "music class" which was nothing more than playing a recorder and listening to songs that our "music teacher" liked, like the song Peaches. Ugh. Anyway, I had this song kind of stuck in the back of my head for several years. And it took me that long to find it again because the song was called Buddy Holly. Yeah, that's not the person who sang it lol. Cool music video though, since they took Happy Days and plugged themselves into it.


This was my favorite song as a child. Why? Hell if I know lol. I just remember they never freaking played it on the radio and I always got so dang upset when they would play some other Neil Sedaka song instead.
(I am not this old. Believe it or not I'm only 29.)

Bonnie Tyler - Holding Out for a Hero

This is an interesting one. Another song that took me many years to track down. This song actually reminds me of my trip to Las Vegas and Star Trek: The Experience at the Las Vegas Hilton, because this song played on a preview to the movie Star Trek: First Contact (on VHS) which also included a preview to Star Trek: The Experience, where I begged and begged my parents to take me one day. The reason it took me so long to track it down because if you watch the aforementioned preview, you can tell it's not Bonnie Tyler singing it, and I don't know who is. (Plus I was looking for song titles like "Hero" and "I Need a Hero".)


Yeah believe it or not somebody posted this and THANK YOU. Ah, the memories.

MST3K - He Tried to Kill Me With a Forklift!

And this one reminds me of my Joshie. My late fiancee. He not only loved this song, but he played two different versions of it on his keyboard. I think this is my favorite MST3K movie ever.


This song reminds me of my Grandma. She passed away a few of years ago. The reason it reminds me of her is because her name is actually in it: Lucy Brown. Pretty cool.




This song shows my stubborninity. Yeah, that's a word I made up. Sounds better than stubbornness :P and  this is why. (It's kind of a long post. Feel free to scroll down a bit to the second set of italics.)

Songs have always reminded me of specific events in my history. Riyu Kosaka's Begin always reminds me of running around in World of Warcraft because it was on eternal repeat while I played it. The Chiffon's One Fine Day will forever remind me of an old crush I had on a teacher.

And then, there's always this.







Sunday, August 18, 2013

Do You Always Do the Right Thing?

I was inspired to write this blog by a video I saw on a show called "Right This Minute". It was titled

Do The Right Thing



In it, the man creates an incentive to do the right thing when you find a wallet full of cash. He will even send you free stickers that allow you to put them on your stuff to entice people to do the right thing if they find it.

It got me thinking about a time where I did the right thing. People always get asked "If you found a wallet full of cash, what would you do?" and it's honestly hard to think of an answer. Of course you want to do what's right, but in the heat of the moment - do you? Maybe you're struggling financially. Maybe you're about to get your car taken away, or don't have enough money to feed yourself until you get paid again. That money would help you a lot, wouldn't it?

Those thoughts never occurred to me when I found a wallet in the parking lot. It had been our first - and last - Black Friday camp out at a Best Buy. We were probably the 6th people in line, having set up camp at 11am on Thanksgiving Day. You feel a sense of camaraderie with all the people waiting in line with you. You share your food, they share their propane heater (it was probably 26 degrees out that night). When morning hits and Best Buy opens their doors, you don't rush in like crazed maniacs, there's an order to the madness. And when Justin and I were leaving with our goods in hand, and it was still dark out, I noticed a wallet in the parking lot. I looked inside and saw an ID and I think about $40 in cash.

I didn't even consider taking it.

Because it was Black Friday, there were security personnel or cops standing at the entrances to make sure everyone was cordial. I walked the wallet up to them and said I'd found it in the lot. They took it and I went home. I didn't feel like I'd done anything special or out of the ordinary. I was just doing what I knew was right, and something that I hoped someone would do for me if they found my wallet in the parking lot.

Do you have any instances where you had to choose to do the right thing? Please share in the comments!



Friday, August 16, 2013

Raising Awareness of - bah, whatever.


I'm getting older, there's no doubt about it, and shit happens to my body that I'm not happy about. I really have no right to complain though. After all, the things I go through are not life threatening, or dangerous, or even anything more than very annoying. So far I've been lucky, I guess. Gallstones, IBS and what-have-you. I have something new to add to my list (although I've been able to take a couple of things off too, like being allergic to nickel and to certain deodorants - I think. I dunno, I haven't bought any Secret or Sure since I started getting itchy rashes from using it). It's called blepharitis. In lamen's terms, that basically means eyelash dandruff. And you would think no big deal, right? Well after several months of suffering, because I wear contacts, I finally felt validated when I got this diagnosis. My eyes were so itchy that I was rubbing the contacts right out of them. My eyesight would get blurry before bed, yet I would wake up perfectly fine. (I wear Aqua Night & Days. I have issues putting in and taking out contacts, so anything less than 30-day wear is not worth the hassle). When I switched to my glasses my eyes no longer suffered. Naturally, I assumed it was the contacts. Yet I kept switching out pairs and it would keep reoccurring. These were 30-day contacts, and I couldn't wear them for more than a couple of days before this horrible itching and blurriness would happen. When it came time for me to re-order my contacts because I was out, I decided to see an Optometrist first to determine if they were really the problem. And if the solution was to take them out each night, then I wasn't going to bother ordering the Night & Days, since they are much more expensive. 

That's when I received my diagnosis, and I was so relieved that it wasn't my contacts. All the puzzle pieces started coming together. First of all, I was not diagnosed with it during my eye exam in April because I wasn't having a flare-up at the time. And when I did, I would blink the flakes into my eyes and they would get stuck on the contacts, which is why my eyes felt fine with my glasses. The reason I always felt good in the morning was because my eyes remained closed - and essentially clean, and would worsen throughout the day. It was like Mystery Diagnosis, only I didn't go several years with a debilitating condition where people called me crazy. But whatever. Point is, I had an answer. So now what? There's a couple things you can do. First of all: hot compress over the eyes, which I actually enjoy because heat is always my friend. Number two: get an antibiotic ointment from your optometrist for the flare-ups, which I did. I rub it above my lashes 2x a day for 7 days to control the amount of bacteria that is plugging the pores. And those two things combined will control the flare-up. And I will need to do this every time I have one. I also bought some eyelid wipes to help keep my eyes clean, and will also start taking omega-3's as a supplement. I've read that it helps balance the oil production with your tears. These are both preventative measures that will hopefully reduce the flare-ups.

It's totally worth it in order to wear contacts. Why?

I prefer to see the spider BEFORE I hop into the shower naked, thank you!



Monday, August 12, 2013

Weird Movie Sequels

So, on a trip yesterday, Justin and I were stuck in a weird traffic jam on I-90 for about 22 miles. We contemplated our demise as we sat in the longest backup of my life. Our only foodstuffs were inedible chicken and waffle potato chips (who votes for this shit?) and items bought at a market; including apple butter, peaches, honey-roasted peanuts, and a bottle of Tropical Sunset wine. Deciding we would rather be closer to starvation before eating the chips, we settled on talking about movies. I noticed earlier on the drive; a red truck barreling down a road in the middle of a piece of farmland. Twister was one of my favorite movies of all time and suddenly spouted that they should have made a sequel. Justin's reply was "a sequel for what?" This lead to an interesting game of "Name a Movie That Doesn't Have a Sequel and Never Would", basically. Mine was Twister 2: Waterspout. Justin's was The Day After Tomorrow 2: Today.

Here are a few more we made up, including a couple from my friend Jim, who got in on it with us:


  • Shawshank Redemption 2: Guantanamo Bay
  • Battlefield Earth 2: Nobody's Here
  • Independence Day 2: Cinco De Mayo
  • Mrs. Doubtfire 2: The Operation
  • Taken 3: Come Back
  • The Transporter 4: Next Day Delivery
  • Mommie Dearest 2: No More Wire Hangers
  • Signs 2: Billboards Among Us


Which one is your favorite? Can you think of any good ones? Let me know in the comments!

I think I see my car...

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

World's Worst Hacker

I'm not exactly sure what Ms. Khan was trying to accomplish. Ms. Khan, who has a PO Box in Oakland, CA, a physical address in Michigan, and a phone number with the prefix of 253, which is the area I live in, and who has the email address of a guy's name @aol.com.

How do I know this stuff?

Because she's the worst hacker in the world.

Well, I'll admit, she somehow got my email address and managed to figure out my password, which I thought was a pretty good one but apparently not. I got home from work yesterday and noticed these "You changed your information" emails from my Newegg.com account. (Newegg by the way, is an amazing techie website for computer parts, phones, stereos and what not. And no tax!). It's strange, because I did have my credit card info saved on my account, however I was using the V.me, (which if you don't know, helps secure your card for online purchases) but instead of using my info to buy her Sony Xperia SP LTE C5306 Black 4G Dual-Core 1.7GHz Unlocked Cell Phone she started changing all of my information to her information. Changing the billing and shipping address, which I was getting the email notifications for, and also her attempt to buy the phone with her own card and not mine, because the last thing she thought of was to change my email address to hers.

It was a simple task to call Newegg customer service. With my name and phone number, the rep easily saw that my account was being hacked. Unfortunately, the only way to stop it was to block the account and shut it down completely. Sigh. So, I had to make a whole new one, with a shiny new password, and lost all my purchase history.

I'm seriously considering emailing this chick. What do ya'll think of "I blocked the account. Nice try, though."


Monday, July 29, 2013

Majestical part 2

If you missed it, here's Part 1!

The plan of attack for day two was nothing but hiking at the Hoh Rain Forest in Olympic National Park. Normally a 4 hour drive from home and as many miles as you can hike in a day, it was much better to stay the night close by and start early in the morning. We'd gotten back from Neah Bay at around 11pm and plopped straight into bed, waking the next morning at 7. With Hot Pockets filling our bellies for breakfast, we checked out of our hotel and started the 1 hour drive down to the Rain Forest.


Our first stop was at one of the biggest Sitka Spruce Trees in the US. ->
Yeah, I needed to use the panorama feature on my camera for that.
















It was the perfect day for a hike. Catching the rain forest on a non-rainy day is tough, especially when you're four hours away. The day was more than perfect.
It was like walking though Jurassic Park. The trees were massive, and there were ferns covering every inch of forest floor. 
I even found a creek that resembled something like that which Norman slid down while trying to avoid the Dilophosaurus. 

There were a couple of water falls, but the real spectacle was the Hoh River. Although it was probably at its lowest point of the year, it was still quite beautiful. 
Once Justin and I reached Mt. Tom's Creek 2.9 miles in, we trekked to the river and I pulled out the smoked salmon and smoked trout I'd made a couple days prior. It was the perfect lunch while sitting on a log and watching the river. 



The hike itself wasn't difficult at all. It was mostly flat and fairly easy to traverse, although my trekking poles did come in handy a couple of times. I was also wearing my brand new hiking boots; a pair of Keen Gypsum mid-highs, which I hadn't even had a chance to break in. So far, I absolutely love them. I'll be doing a review on Amazon once I test them out a bit more (aka, Pinnacle Peak), but I believe they're quite good for the price. (REI is selling them for $140 but shhh, I got them for $84!)

After the hike, we went straight home, since it was a 4 hour drive. I was so glad I could do this on a Friday/Saturday so that I could have Sunday to relax! Luckily, I didn't get sore at all. 6 miles, in any terrain, is usually my limit!

I'll leave you now with a couple more pics!



Sunday, July 28, 2013

Majestical part 1

Did I grab the attention of all the grammar nazis? Good, because I made that word up on purpose! Ha :P It's a mix of magical and majestic, and that's what my recent vacation was. It required a one night stay in the town known as Forks. Yes, that Forks.



My plan was to get off early at work and drive down to Forks. I got the cheapest motel in the area, and I do mean cheap. At $60 a night, it didn't even have a phone or a clock radio. But it did have a fridge, microwave, and a TV with dish network, plus free wifi, so good enough! I wasn't planning on spending any time in there anyway! It's a 3 hour drive to Forks, and we got there just in time for dinner. We tried to eat at this place called the Smoke House Restaurant but it was closed, sadly. We needed to drive up to Neah Bay anyway because I wanted to see Cape Flattery, so we decided to try and find a place to eat up there.

For those unfamiliar with Neah Bay and the surrounding area, it is at the tip of the most northwest point in the continental U.S, and owned by the Makah tribe. I don't know much of anything about spending time in a Reservation, but I do know this: I immediately felt unwelcome. Justin and I stopped at the first restaurant in town: The Warmhouse. It was a typical homey place. I was looking forward to some clam strips. We walked in, and there were about 5 people (yes, everyone inside were Natives) standing at a desk looking like they were waiting to pay. We stood around for a couple minutes and noticed the sign saying "please seat yourself", so we scooted past them and started looking for a place to sit. Then we heard, rudely, "Excuse me, we're waiting." I turned, and politely answered "Oh. The sign said please seat yourself," but started walking back anyway. I'm one to always avoid conflict when possible. They looked at it, didn't apologize or anything, and found a place to sit, and so did we. Within a couple of minutes we got our menus. But then we waited, and waited. And as we waited, I felt the stares. We were the only white people in there that I noticed, and I was starting to feel very uncomfortable. We were ready to order by the time the waitress brought us our water, but she never asked if we were ready and walked off without a word. I was beginning to feel as if we were being purposefully ignored. I told Justin to try to get the attention of the waitress, and as he was putting his hand up, so did the table behind us. She walked over to them instead of us, and by then I'd had it. We'd waited probably 10-15 minutes to get our order taken and she just didn't care. We walked out. And I could swear that group behind Justin had laughed as we left.

Luckily, that was the worst of the whole trip, though. We stopped at the very next place, called Linda's Wood-fired Kitchen and Motel. A motel was a good spot to feel more welcomed, as there were other races besides Native Americans there. Now, I have absolutely no problem with any race, least of all the Native Americans. And I have never gone out of my way to act as if they were any different than anyone else. Being on the receiving end of this deep-rooted hatred, or malice, or whatever you want to call it, was very unpleasant and I never hope to feel that way again. Linda's was perfect. We ordered a pizza and it was absolutely delicious. I was much happier giving my money to someone who showed no ill-will towards anyone, no matter what their race or ethnicity. 

After we ate, the sun was beginning to set, and we needed to get up to Cape Flattery in time to get some good pictures before and during sunset. But first we had to find out where to buy this so-called "Recreation Permit". On our drive around this tiny town, something was "happening", and we had no idea what the hub-bub was. The road down to the beaches were blocked, people parked beyond with surfing gear. We drove into the residential part of town where the road was stuffed with cars and tents littered everywhere, on everyone's lawn and beyond. It was the strangest sight. We found the town's store and paid for our permit, and headed up the road to the cape. It was a 3/4 of a mile walk, but they had made it very nice, adding a boardwalk similar to Lake Ozette

The walk up to the Cape was littered with very interesting trees, and a couple stops along the way to view the ocean. The sights were magnificent. I wanted to stay to see the sunset, and got a couple of good shots of Tatoosh Island.



This was a very popular spot, even for the locals apparently. It was easy to access and private. And the sunset was beautiful.
Afterwards, we headed back to our car in the dark, along with everybody else. There had probably been 15 people up there with us to watch the sunset. On our way out of town back to our motel in Forks, we noticed that their Gym, which looked huge and brand new, was surrounded with people. Hundreds of them were standing right inside/outside and in the parking lot. All we could think was "oookay" and move on. We never did find out what was going on down there!





Well, that was day one! Tomorrow, we travel to the Hoh Rain Forest!


Thursday, July 25, 2013

Review of JJ's Fish House

I wanted to like it! I swear, I don't walk into these restaurants with any preconveived notions. However, I was trying to find a fishmonger, not a restaurant. (Have you ever noticed when you're looking for a butcher, you can type in "butcher" and get butchers, but when you type in "fishmonger" you get a bunch of shitty restaurants?) But, we were hungry anyway, so might as well try them out.

A little background: I order calamari everywhere I go. If it's on the menu, I want to try it. I have found two absolutely amazing places that make calamari as an appitizer: The RAM and Duke's Chowder House, both on Ruston Way in Tacoma. Masa on 6th Ave also makes a good variety (their food is excellent, by the way), and I've had them at other places as well that were delicious. But JJ's Fish House? Sigh.

JJ's Fish House - 18881 Front St. Poulsbo, WA 98370

The location is central to downtown Poulsbo, which is horrid in terms of parking. Even though they were sitting right at the central parking lot, we had to park far away and walk in. The wait staff were kind and very attentive, although we only arrived 30 minutes after they opened. We ate outside because it was nasty humid inside the restaurant, and if I think it's hot, then it's damn hot. (here's why)

Appitizer: Calamari - Fresh cut rings of bay squid with a light lemon pepper batter and choice of classic Marinara or Garlic Aioli dipping sauces.

It was the worst calamari I've ever had. Their batter was bland and tempura-like. They either over-fried or under-fried the squid, which leads to a very chewy texture. The "classic marinara" dipping sauce was watery and flavorless. The Garlic aioli was decent.

For lunch, I had:

SALMON FOCCACCIA SANDWICH
Delicate cold poached salmon fillet, dillsour cream aioli, capers, fresh sliced tomato and crispy greens on an open faced sun dried tomato foccaccia bread.

The bread was good. I liked it. I don't much care for the "open-face" concept (if I want a sandwich, I want a freaking sandwich) I assumed they would at least bring me the top piece so that if I wanted to eat it like a sandwich, I could. The bread was warm, but the salmon was cold. I know, that's how it comes. But as I was eating it (with a knife) I thought it would taste better if the salmon was warm. The aioli was tasty, and I loved the capers. All in all, not a bad dish. It certainly beat out the appitizer!

Would I come back? Not really. Not much on the menu really appealed to me. They seem like "the place to go" when in Poulsbo, but I just wasn't that impressed. I can handle food that tastes "good", if maybe not creative, but when they show that they can't fry calamari correctly, it's really disappointing!

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

When is a Hike Worth It?

When you get views like this:


And like this:


And this:


This magical wonderland of breathtaking views is called Hurricane Hill, located at the top portion of the Olympic Mountain Range. And it was actually a relatively easy hike. Now, I often read "reviews" of people who go on hikes and tell you how easy or difficult said hike was. What they fail to mention is that they are usually avid hikers that backpack overnight, walk 12 miles a day, and do it all year round. I'm not that person. I'm 175 lbs, as weak as a puppy, and have the lung capacity of a marmot. (I have no idea how long marmots can hold their breath; maybe Google knows.) So when I say it was relatively easy, well, that might be a fairly accurate assessment! It was a 950 foot climb in 1.6 miles, but a lot of it was still flat, so it wasn't a straight shot up the whole time. Most of it was out in the open grassland though, which afforded a view almost the entire hike up, but also meant you were in full sun saturation. 


But considering how short the hike was (and how quickly you can get from Port Angeles to Hurricane Ridge), it was very little effort for a great reward.


Now I can finally cross it off of my Places I Visit Out of Spite list!



Monday, July 8, 2013

When Good Toilets Go Bad

I seem to be reading numerous blog posts today with some kind of poop and toilet theme. I'm not sure if this is a blog hop I'm missing or what, but it brought back old memories and I figured I'd share to join in the fun!

When I was a kid, I was scared of weird toilets. Sure, I could use other people's potties if I had to, but I surely disliked it. Whenever I entered a stranger's abode, I would look all up and down and from side to side as if I was trying to avoid a murderer hiding in the corner (nowadays I do this for spiders, but I digress). I was scared to death of all white toilets that had black seats. It was like I was setting my ass on a black hole. I thought I'd be sucked in. And a completely black toilet? Yeah, forget that! For the longest time I refused to use all porta potties. I don't know about you, but I always had to look down into them first before even attempting to sit, and that never helped the situation. Sometimes I'd fear shit crawling out of them, and I don't mean that in the literal sense!

I was going to post a picture of a porta potty here.
I would HIGHLY recommend you not type that in Google image search.

I would have toilet dreams when I was younger, too. Well, more like toilet nightmares. I remember this one specifically where my mom was trying to find me a toilet to use, and we were in this big warehouse room with every kind of toilet under the sun, but like Goldilocks, none of them were right! One was too big, one was too small, one was spraying water all over the place, one was cracked and leaking; and man I had to pee bad when I woke up!

I have really bad luck with automatic toilets. They seems to like to flush when I'm sitting on them - which is totally disgusting when your butt gets washed with dirty toilet water! This isn't a bidet, people! (People with bidets are weird. I mean, I get why they're neat, but a whole separate toilet-like device taking up a chunk of real estate in a bathroom? Seems a bit dumb to me.) And they never flush once I stand up! If I can't find the button to flush it with, or if there isn't one, I'll stand in the stall like a moron wondering what my options are. Should I wave my hand all stupidly in front of the sensor? Should I sit back down? Should I just... walk out? Ew.

I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that.

Ever had to use a bathroom with stalls that had no doors? I did! At a freaking wedding no less! What the heck kind of place has a bathroom with no stall doors? I stood there all nervous, looking like I was a dumb teenager about to tag the walls and didn't want anybody to catch me doing it. It took me about 15 minutes to rack up the courage to finally go to the bathroom. And oh, pro-tip: if you ever find yourself in a stall with an unlock-able door, use a wad of toilet paper to keep it closed. It seems obvious, but back in HS we had a huge number of students, and during passing periods the bathrooms would have lines out the door. And no one ever used the stall with the broken lock like it was cursed or something. There were also a number of times where a jerk would try to be funny and lock a stall door and somehow climb out so that no one else could use it. I just shrugged it off and slid underneath the stall door to get in. Now that I think about it, that's probably why I didn't have any friends. But hey, when you gotta go, you gotta go!

Did you have any weird experiences with bathrooms? Share them in the comments!

I can't even...

Monday, July 1, 2013

Wait... we have marmots?

So recently I read an article describing this hike as [paraphrasing] "If you can only do one hike in the Olympics, this is it". Since one of my Internet friends is planning on a touristy visit soon and loves hiking, I mentioned this place, aptly named "Marmot Pass", because I guess there are marmots! So, I also decided to try it myself, but I knew this was pretty much going to be beyond my current abilities. I love to hike, but I'm not a "hiker". I don't have all the gear, and I don't overnight camp. I knew 11 total miles would be hard, especially going up 3500 feet in the process, but I was trying to psyche myself up for it. "Just take lots of breaks" "You can do this!" because apparently the views at the end are incredible. Plus, I wanted to let my friend know how the hike was.

I was also going at it alone because [sad panda face] no one I know wants or can go with me. Mom was very worried for me, but I knew I would be okay. On the rape and murder scale, I figure Upper Big Quilcene Trail (the actual name) is about a 0. Why? Well, several reasons:

1. It's located in Olympic National Forest, so it requires at least a $5 day pass.
2. It's about a 20 mile drive from the nearest town (Quilcene) to the trailhead, on National Forest roads no less, which include a lot of one-way roads at a max of 30 MPH.
3. No rapist in his right mind would climb upwards of 3500 feet to do his deed.
4. There was no where to hide. The Quicene River was always to my left down an embankment, and to the right was the other side of the embankment. (This also meant no where to pee if need be!) Plus, it's a popular trail and I often ran into other hikers.

I'm not dumb, however. I'd never hike a place like Banner Forest alone. Besides the possibilty of bears (which has been an issue there in the past) it's a huge forest with many trails and lots of places to hide. It's depressing that I can't even hike at a popular place like Pt. Defiance Park either, though.

The hike itself was beautiful. I was in awe of the splendor. I got several shots of the river, many of which were not sutible for posting, but still okay pics. It was a well-made trail with only a few issues of slippery rocks or muddy paths. I did have to cross three creeks though, which made me incredibly glad that my hiking boots are water resistant! 
<---- this is one of them. There was no way to avoid getting your feet wet!

Well anyway, long story short, I didn't reach the end. When I finally decided to turn around 2.8 miles in, I was angry and disappointed in myself. I did have several reasons for doing so however, and by the time I was .5 miles heading back the way I'd come, I was extremely glad I'd turned around when I did.

I was very ill-prepared for this type of hike. I didn't think 5.6 miles one way would be that big of a deal - but I was wrong. I didn't pack enough food or water. Blisters were forming on the heels of my feet, and on the decent? Oh, that was even worse. I have hard-toe hiking boots, and my toes were being crushed. That seemed to hurt even worse than the blisters and made my decent (of probably around 1200 feet) incredibly slow. On top of that, I had to pee. And actually, that was the worst problem of all, because although I was thinking "okay, I have ways to combat these problems I'm having", I've got no solution for needing to pee. As I stated above, there's not a lot of privacy out here, at least in the first 2.8 miles. How could I, or anyone, possibly make it 11 whole miles?!
                                                 

On the plus side, I splurged on these Zensah compression sleeves for my calves that I'd read would help with soreness recovery time, and they seem to be working wonders. Since my hike at Pinnacle Peak had me sore for a good 5 days, I thought I'd give these a shot. So far, they're basically a miracle. I have a muscle fatigue issue where the calf starts shaking uncontrollably and I feel as though I might collapse, which was almost a non-issue this time. Also, they kept my legs cool even though it was a good 80 degrees up there in the sun. I have a good feeling that I won't be sore nearly as long this time either. We will see!

I do want to try this hike again, but I obviously need better equipment and more training. I'm hoping hiking poles will take some of the stress off my toes on my decent. I also think I need to splurge on some good wool socks and mole skin for my heels or some kind of wrap. Once those problems are taken care of, I should be good to go!

PS - If anyone has any hiking tips, I'm more than open to suggestions!!

Friday, June 28, 2013

I like Demolition Derbies, in case you wondered how feminine I was

Today is another Finish the Sentence Friday, and today it's

The best fourth of July I had was...

I've done a number of things as a child for 4th of July. Some of the time, my parents and I would go to the ocean. We were allowed to park on the beach, and we'd watch the fireworks coming from a boat or a nearby town. Once we went to a city on the bay, and we were so close to the launch point that my stomach pretty much fell out of my body with every "BOOM" and "BANG". I didn't really enjoy it that year. I think my favorite 4th were the times that we went to the Demolition Derby. Back before Spanaway Speedway closed (The track was there first - people who bought their houses around it and then complained of the noise! Geez) they had a few derbies a year, which I always enjoyed going to, but they really pulled all the stops for 4th of July, and the one up in Monroe is even better (heck of a long drive, though).

cmon, who doesn't want to see carnage like this?!

It's not just about cars ramming into each other. It's about hinging all your bets on a specific car and screaming at them to at least make it to the end of the race. It's about watching cars dragging boats behind them while doing figure 8s, or wooping at cars that try to race each other while chained together. Watching busses race is always a blast too. And then when it's all said and done, you get to watch fireworks blast off. It's really the perfect end to a fun-packed day. I'm hoping I can make it up there this year, because thanks to working in a medical clinic, 5 out of the 7 years when the 4th of July is on a weekday, I can't do anything where I need to stay up late. Luckily, our doctor loves us and is giving us Friday off this year. Woop Woop!

Monday, June 24, 2013

Do I have a bad luck aura?

There is this blog hop (I think it's a blog hop?) called Monday Listicles. I have no idea if there is a specific weekly topic so I'm just going to choose one. The reason I chose this topic is because I'm seeing a rather odd trend popping up.

10 things that have been broken more than once:

1. Water pumps. I've had two, maybe three cars I've owned have the water pumps burst. I'm only 29 years old and It's not like I've owned these cars for 10 years. One of the accidents happened, oddly enough, when Josh's parents were visiting from Texas. I'd insisted on driving my old, beat up Reliant K car to my parent's house even though they had a beautiful Chevy Impala rental. Luckily, the water pump had burst fairly close to Purdy, since none of us had cell phones back then.

2. Chevy Malibu fuse. I stated this briefly in a previous post: Crapsman... said the Blind Woman. Twice now I've had to replace the fuse that powers only the two cigarette lighters in the front of the car. Of course, I never know that they're broken until I try to use the air compressor to re-inflate a tire. They seem to work for something taking low power, like the GPS (sometimes) or charging my phone. (Which dad says is very strange because once a fuse is broken, nothing should work). At least I know how to replace fuses now!

3. Dryer. I've always lived in apartments, so when things break down, it's their responsibility. It was their dumbass decision to keep around washers and dryers from the 70s and just have a repairman come to fix them up whenever they broke. Well, after tinkering around with the old dryer, he decided to replace it with a new model, which then broke down twice a few months later.

4. Fridge. Same apartment complex. Old fridge from the 80's broke, which is always a lot of fun because you have to shove everything into a cooler and all your frozen items become garbage. It was replaced by an even older model (oh yay), which also broke a few months later. Good times.

...okay that's all I've got for duplicate breakages.

5. Water Heater. Again, same apartment complex. Yeah, that was a blast. Our roommate noticed water pooling on the kitchen floor in the middle of the night, covered it with towels, and went to bed. Great. I get up around 9am, and see completely drenched bath towels on the kitchen floor and water everywhere. When I called the maintenance guy, he'd already gotten a complaint of water leaking through the ceiling from the downstairs neighbors. In order to get the water heater out of the pantry, I had to remove all the food and he had to take out the shelves. He couldn't even find where it was leaking from, so he just had to replace it.

6. The oven. This time, a different apartment. And it (sadly) wasn't even that broken. I regret calling into the landlord that our broiler coil was non-functional. We had a really neat 60's or 70's oven that had a glass opening so you could see into it. It also had a rotisserie (that we never used, but it was still cool!). She tried to save money by trying to get the broiler replaced, but the oven was too old. So, without my permission, she bought another used oven to replace it. We'd already lived without the broiler for several months - I didn't want to replace the whole oven! And the sucky part was that this oven was just an inch or 2 too long, and you couldn't slide out the side cabinet drawer without opening the oven door first. Sigh.

7. The 1995 Mercury Mystique. I could write an entire blog post on this car. Suffice it to say, I was glad when I finally decided to "cube" it (in other words, send it to the junkyard for scrap. I got the cube idea from this: crusher machine) Besides the fact that you had to start the car by sticking two wires together (but if you kept them connected, the after market car alarm would go off every few seconds while driving down the street), the final death had something to do with broken mounting brackets. The engine would move around and wires would be pulled, causing the car to randomly die. The car wasn't worth fixing at that point, so we gladly said to scrap it. Never again. Ever.

*Shivers in disgust*. This thing was a money pit.
8. 2002 Buick Century. This was the car we replaced the Mystique with. This time, it wasn't the fault of the car (which was beautiful. Leather seats, auto everything, and self adjusting rear view mirror... I was in heaven!) This time, my husband drove over a curb going 50 miles and hour, popping the tire, scraping the oil pan and bending the axle, causing the air bags to deploy which cracked the windshield. That one-person accident basically totalled the car. Twas a sad, sad day.

... I'm all out of interesting breakage stories. I think I have some kind of appliance/car gremlin hanging around me, and it's running out of ideas on how to break my shit! Go away, dammit. I'll never be able to buy my own home and afford all the crap I'll have to fix!

Anyone else have any interesting breakage stories they'd like to share? Please tell me I'm not the only one!