I'm Essential

I've been waffling about starting this post for a while. It only makes sense to write about COVID-19, but it also feels like it's compounded information that seems redundant and unnecessary. Although I am considered an "essential employee" and figuratively on the "front line", it almost feels like camouflage because I'm not a nurse, and I'm not working in ICU or the ER.  I'll take advantage of some of the offerings that companies give for healthcare employees because my badge says that I work at __________, but it almost feels fraudulent. (To keep from getting in trouble, if you know where I work, great. If not, then I can't share that information).

Here in Gynecologic Oncology, our practice hasn't stopped. We're the epitome of needing to be seen, either because you have cancer and it's serious, or because we can't do a pelvic exam over the phone. We've only slowed our practice by pushing out 6 month follow ups by a couple of months, and doing chemo check ups over the phone, but our doctor is still seeing new patients in person, and is still doing surgeries.

We're always lumped into all the other practices when it comes to new rules and regulations, especially regarding COVID-19, which seems to change daily. While other practices can reduce the number of patients coming into the office to practically zero, we can not do that. So when they implement rules like "give every patient and visitor a mask" even when we are running low on PPE and our supplier keeps cancelling our mask orders (in addition to telling us to wear the same mask daily until it gets soiled), it's frustrating. We are going to run out of masks. We saw 18 patients yesterday between two providers, and 11 patients today with the Physician alone. Granted, some people come in with cloth masks, and thank goodness because otherwise we'd be out already, but we're still dangerously low.

Some of the rules that employees have to go through regarding screening seems ridiculous. We have to fill out an online form daily that says we don't have COVID symptoms, and yet we still have to get our temperature checked every day as if the "do you have a fever over 100.0?" wasn't even asked. Where does this online form even go? Why are we filling it out if it doesn't get stored somewhere accessible? But come on - we're healthcare workers. We're not stupid. We're literally living inside COVID every day working here. Do you really think we'd just waltz into work coughing, aching and feverish? Giving zero cares about patients or co-workers? Give us a little credit.

We were informed a few weeks ago that a patient of ours had tested positive for COVID-19. It happened very interestingly - she had been here for a post op check, had no symptoms what so ever, and had gone to the ED the next day and was (for some reason) tested for COVID, and ended up being positive. The most irritating part of all of this was the lack of testing available for the provider who was locked in a room, all up in her biz for well over 10 minutes, and for the nurse who checked her in. Our provider was sick with at least 2 of the 3 main symptoms, and was refused testing by our facility. Instead, she had to go outside of it. She tested negative, however false negatives are always a possibility and I assume this is the case with her due to the circumstances. How does a patient presenting with no obvious symptoms of COVID get a test, but the provider treating her does not?

For the record, my task, due to being "moderately at risk" having been the one checking her in, had to report my temperature twice a day to a stupid recording, for 2 weeks straight. Again, like we need to be babied. As if we can't check our temperature ourselves because we're responsible adults WORKING AROUND COVID, and we might know when we feel out of sorts or feverish.

wish I could look this good while feeling sick

For a couple of weeks, we had a screening system going for our building. When COVID was first introduced, they cut off access to the hospital from our building - the doors to the skybridge have been closed for a while. They then implemented a screening station on each floor where patients were re-directed to check in prior to coming to the clinic they were scheduled at.

I often joked that our door handle was the most dangerous spot in the building, because patients either refused to see, ignored, or got confused over the copious RED SIGNS that pointed to the screening station around the corner, and would attempt to walk in without being screened. 

There were many things wrong with the set up for screening.
1. It was in an enclosed hallway and it was internal, meaning patients had to park, use the elevator, and then get screened. 
2. It needed to be manned by two nurses at all times due to someone having to stay if a nurse needed to report to the clinic about patient symptoms. This also presented a problem because we didn't have nurses just lying around doing nothing, so it was hard to get coverage.
3. They had to take temperatures up close with an in-ear thermometer but were provided no face shields; only surgical masks, while patients were wearing nothing.
4. The in-ear thermometer was wildly inaccurate, to the point where it was giving almost everyone a low grade fever.
5. They had to fill out a form and hand it to the patient, who then in turn had to hand it to me (and I had to hand it to a nurse), which is a point of contact/failure.

They then ended the practice only 2 weeks into it because we were too low on PPE to continue.

Can I get a -_- ?

We were supposed to be getting cloth masks. This whole thing was announced almost a month ago. While we waited, and reused the same surgical masks day in and day out, they stated that the other hospitals were getting them first. The smaller, less busy, non triage site, hospitals. Okay, whatever... two weeks later, "we're in the process of delivering masks". And now, complete radio silence. What happened to our cloth masks? What the hell? Our manager is also attempting to get unused masks from clinics who have completely shut down for the time being but can't seem to get those either.


I am under no delusions that cloth masks are better than surgical masks. But at least cloth masks are reusable. And we can save the surgical masks for the ED, ICU, or urgent care clinics.

I'm to the point where I don't even care if I get sick or not. I mean, I care, but not enough to be in a panic over it. I'm more worried about Patrick getting sick, as his lungs are slightly compromised. Patrick and I were already homebodies. Our routines haven't changed much. Mine basically hasn't changed at all, as I still work 8 hours a day 5 days a week. He got laid off from the casino, but it is kind of a blessing in disguise because he wanted out anyway, and now he has a chance to go back to school and do something else.

I am just stressed over all of this crap - as of course I'm sure every one is; and also not nearly as stressed as the healthcare workers on the actual front line. Or as stressed as the people who are without a job and unable to get unemployment for whatever reason. I'm blessed to have a job during this time that is for sure. I am not complaining about that in the slightest. But can I be jealous for a moment about all these articles I'm reading with various headlines akin to "What to do with all your spare time!" "Start a new habit with all this spare time!" "Get Free this, that, or the other for all of that extra time!" Wish I could take advantage of that stuff!

Anyway, I just finally wanted to write about this stuff and get it out there, for the people who have been wondering what it's like "on the other side". Wish me luck!